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Where are you?

August 7th, 2011

Do you read the papers while having breakfast? Do you drive but your mind is somewhere else? Do you talk on the phone while answering an email? Do you worry about work piling on your desk while on vacation? Are you worried that it will rain tomorrow and your plan will be ruined? Do you end the day still worrying about the mistake you made this morning? Do you find yourself still angry over an incident that happened last week?

Very often, we are here but our mind is somewhere else. Today morning while having my breakfast I realized that we eat but we don’t taste. We look but we don’t see. We hear but we don’t listen. We read but we don’t register. We sob over yesterday. We worry about tomorrow. We live in the past. We live in the future. But we don’t live in the moment.

Life is made up of precious moments. Live it well. Relish the taste of the food you eat. Chew slowly. Be thankful. Be awed by the magnificence around you. The blooming flowers. The feathery rain. The new born baby. Focus on whatever you are doing. Work while at work. Play while at play. Sleep while at sleep. Don’t mix them up. Be happy. Enjoy while on holiday. Learn the culture. Try the food. Have fun. Don’t worry. What’s done is done. What’s said is said. Don’t let it upset you. Don’t carry forward anything unpleasant. I remember my sister-in-law (Bhakti Shah) saying, “Each one has been blessed here with a huge bank balance of moments. Each moment holds a soul, a breath of its own and we have no right to strangle that breath.” So let us enjoy every moment. Smile readily. Laugh heartily. You only have this moment. Treasure it. Respect it. Live it.

Develop Patience in a blink

August 7th, 2011

These days, everything is instant.

The instantaneous nature of so many aspects of modern society is empowering and also a great convenience. It’s so easy, in fact, that we take a lot of it for granted. We don’t want to wait for anything. Our country is home to fast food and drive-through banking. Travel has never been faster. Communicating has never been easier. Watching “On Demand” entertainment and enjoying other forms of media is not only affordable, but requires as little as a click of the mouse or a television remote control or even cell phones.

“Instant” living gives way to impatience. Because everything is instant, we are so much more likely to be impatient in many aspects (if not every aspect!) of our lives. Slight delays in travel feel like a world of inconvenience. When a call goes to voice-mail, it seems like we can never get in touch. The tragedy of modern, instantaneous living is how important patience is, and how difficult it is to develop patience as a result.

Life moves at a frenetic, fast-forward pace, and that makes patience even harder to practice. Yet, the ability to tolerate delay without getting upset is a must-have quality that contributes to our greater sense of well-being.

Here are 2 simple tips for your daily life.

Stop Assuming
Unfortunately, the instantaneous aspect of so many facets of our lives has its drawbacks. When we text message someone and don’t receive a response back for several hours, we debate and ponder the “meaning” of the delay — as if any postponement is an insult, a display of disinterest, or a subtle message that requires a deep interpretation. Whereas the receiver might have not even read the message.

Sometimes, assumptions are worse than reality. When you make assumptions about how things should be, how people should act, or even what they’re thinking, you are doing them and yourself a great disservice. If you act on an assumption without concrete evidence to support your guess, you can fall into a state of distress. Stop assuming matter and free yourself from needless, harmful worry.

Let Go
We can develop patience by learning when to fight for things in life and when to let go. We should not become control freaks, trying to control everything around us, telling the world what is right and wrong, trying to change others, trying to preach the world what we think appropriate, to cite few examples. When we try to control or manipulate external factors that are beyond us, we become impatient and we tend to do many irrevocable mistakes thus making us angrier and unsatisfied. Instead, we should learn to go with the flow and learn to let go of things by not being judgmental. When we stop judging others and start accepting for what they are, our world around us changes drastically.

The title of this article is only to grab your attention and to make you realize how impatient we are. ;)

Your reality is created by YOU

June 7th, 2011

Everybody looks into their life differently. Some feel their life is wonderful while others keep complaining. However, one needs to realize and understand that the life does not treat different people differently. Its different people who treat their life differently. We actually create our own reality.

The meaning of life is not a search – it is a choice. Meaning is not found in things; meaning is what we make of things. The world means nothing by itself. We give it all the meaning it has. Thus, the meaning of life is a choice we make, not just once, but every waking hour of our day.

The moment anything happens to us, we interpret a meaning for it. The meaning we vote for then governs our perception, our thinking, our choices, our feelings, our reactions, our behaviors, everything! Whenever we elect a new meaning, this changes everything. Here is a great key to healing and success.

An event occurs, and it is your interpretation and meaning that decides everything thereafter. There is no universal definition for either good or bad but our thinking makes it so.
For instance:

Two accidents in quick succession may mean God doesn’t care OR you need to take care.

A boss who spends no time with you may mean he doesn’t like you OR he trusts you.

When your beloved doesn’t call it may mean the romance is cooling OR he/she is simply busy.

Losing your lipstick might mean a world emergency OR it’s time to buy some more.

A stain on your shirt might mean a drama OR nothing.

Showing your emotions might be a sign of weakness OR a show of strength.

A failed job interview might mean you lost out OR something even better is in store.

These events mean nothing by itself. Its we who quickly interpret them as “bad” or “good”, “wrong” or “right”. This interpretation governs our thinking and then creates our reality. Fear is not in things; fear is only in the meaning you give things. Pain is not in things; pain is only in the meaning you give things. Change the meaning, and the fear and the pain are transformed.

Whenever you experience any trouble, look at what is troubling you, and ask yourself, “What if ‘bad’ is ‘good’, ‘wrong’ is ‘right,’ and this ‘trouble’ is a ‘gift’?” The fact is, “This could mean anything.” Changing our thoughts this way may help us in changing our interpretation of happening and create a different reality for ourselves. It also helps us to be open and receptive to higher thoughts.

Step one: Declare, “This could mean anything.”

Step two: Suspend all judgments and clear your mind.

Step three: Be open to higher inspiration, a new perception and a more positive interpretation.

Go for a Change

June 6th, 2011

Most people tend to resist making changes. They prefer to stay nestled in their comfort zones and feel uneasy about stepping out. How about you? Do you always sport the same hairstyle, go for the same kind of food, dress in your usual colors and shades, take the same route to work everyday? Do you read the same type of books, listen to certain categories of music, look at things from a certain angle, stick to your job even though you are feeling miserable?

Sometimes, it seems ironic that even when we are struggling in the current situation, we still choose to bear with the pain instead of braving into a new situation. It is as though our world will fall apart if we step out of our comfort zone. Moving out of our comfort zone helps us to expand our thought process and then eventually helps us to break barriers we tend to create in our minds. It may feel uncomfortable and awkward at first but it is just like releasing some knots and unblocking our mind.

Change can be a good thing. Change can be interesting. Change can also be life transforming. However, to embrace change, we need to view change as a friend who is here to help us to become better, to become more interesting, to live a better life.

It is easier to start small instead of going for a drastic changeover. So, the next time, be a little more adventurous. Instead of having your regular paneer tikka and butter naan, why not try a foreign food? Instead of listening to soothing music, why not tune in to rock and roll music? Instead of dressing in your earthy tones, perhaps you can add a dash of color. Let your imagination flow. Initially, you may feel uncomfortable, even fearful. Nevertheless, just persist. As you drop your resistance towards change, you are opening the door to welcome better and exciting possibilities into your life.

Have fun exploring. Enjoy the change.

Enrich your life, learn one new thing every day

April 18th, 2011

I was in Jaipur during March end for a show and there a visited my dad’s college friend, Mr. R. K. Singh’s place for lunch. The delicious lunch that ended with buttermilk (let me not mention the number of glasses i drank) forced me to take a nap there. After all the rest started chit-chatting on various topics. In all the fun talks, Mr. Singh said a statement that hit my mind and I got the topic of my this newsletter article. He said, “No matter how much money I earn, the day I get to learn anything new, I am more than satisfied.

This made me realize that life can get boring if we live day in day out doing the same things and following the same routine. Why not inject something new into your life? It can be something informative, entertaining, interesting, fun, enjoyable or fulfilling. Learn one new thing every day. Enrich yourself. Stretch yourself. Stretch your imagination. Stretch your possibilities. Life becomes more interesting and fun with new learnings.

Learn something new everyday

Learn something new everyday

Here are some suggestions:

1) Learn at least 5 new words daily. Read the papers. Read the magazines. Write down 5 words that you do not understand. Check the meaning and write them in a notebook. Read them and remember them. Find opportunities to use the words you have learned.

2) Learn about the stuff that goes into your body. Get the ingredients list of the things you eat. Look them up and know what goes into you. Learn how to stay healthy.

3) Learn how to set up a blog if you haven’t got one. Surf the net for advice. Share your expertise and talents through your blog. Enrich the life of others while enriching yourself.

4) For those of you who have a passion for cooking, why not surf the internet or borrow a cook book from the library and learn an interesting recipe? Besides having fun, you can surprise and delight your loved ones with your tender loving cooking.

5) Learn how to keep your cool when angry. Learn how to be more understanding and compassionate. Learn how to be a better person. Seek advice and help. It’s everywhere. On the net. In the books. Over the tapes.

6) Learn a new language. Learn body language. Learn how to quit smoking and drinking or any undesirable habits…The list goes on.

Take your time. Learn one new thing every day. Enjoy and have fun.